The Adventures of Now

exploring the mix of fun, fitness & health…as a diabetic


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New Beginnings

Ah life.

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In the past two months I’ve:

– moved apartments

– was let go from my job

– completed my 1st 1/2 marathon 

– joined an outdoor league with my soccer team

– dealt with shin splints, groin strain, hip flexor silliness, IT Band issues & hip pain …. but not a stress fracture

– did early morning runs in Central Park

– ran a 5k on my birthday (in which I was 1st, last & only place since it was my solo birthday 5k).

– had plenty of brunches

– tried plenty of new coffee shops

– went to Hoboken for the 1st time

– exercised some serious self-control in not visiting 16 handles daily despite being closer to it

– put to use the fact that I’m now closer to Target …. but made do with the fact that I’m now further from a Trader Joe’s.

– finally used an oven (it’s only been about 2 years) and have worked on more “real” dinners.

– raised money for Team for Kids (only just begun!)

– started practicing yoga 5 day / week

– baked! (happening.right.now. vitalious chocolate muffin tops in the oven hopefully not sticking/not burning / rising  … all that usual stuff)

– signed up for my 2nd Girls on the Run 5K

– volunteered / will be volunteering at some kids activities with Urban Girl Squad

– met with a nutritionist … and started food journaling again. Sort of.

– learned how many supporters I have, even if it’s easy to forget  … and there’s quite a few!

– donated over 100 items … and got rid of almost as much

– played decorator, handyman & dyi-er … I think I’m most efficient at handyman.

– met new friends, connected with old ones and made fun dates with current ones.

I smell the chocolate tops….that mean it has to come out just as good right?!

– focused on my health … the specifics and the general.

– took a break from my magazine addiction

– started reading books….from the library

– got on the Tone It Up bandwagon (sort of)

– spent time with family

they didn’t burn! off to go see how they taste (I mean I couldn’t have screwed up a prepackaged mix that badly could I?) 

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Losing Count: Why I stopped Food Journaling

I first learned to read nutrition labels when I was old enough to read (or sometime in elementary school), if sugar was one of the first 3 ingredients it wasn’t going in the shopping cart. I started paying attention to the numbers over ingredient list around 5th grade…when I was first introduced to carb counting. Gushers, Goldfish, Chewy granola bars, Rice Krispies treats, Dunkaroos – give me a kids snack from the 90s and I can probably tell you the carbs, serving size…..and calories.

I’m still learning how to deal with a sweet tooth & cravings. Growing up I walked a fine line of restriction when it came to food. Forced to eat when I didn’t want to, not being able to eat when I did. Trading one thing for another, making compromises, testing what I could get away with, trying to fit in but knowing early on that I knew better than most grownups. Control. It’s a funny thing.

I kept loose food journals…of all sizes. Not necessarily diligent in keeping a proper record didn’t hide the fact that the information constantly consumed my thoughts. Is that what stock brokers feel like ? Planning their next move, debating risk & rewards, watching for the next big trend.

It was high school that calories became constantly counted. Again, never fully diligent in writing it down but constantly consuming my thoughts – providing fear, anxiousness and guilt. Not enough to cause drastic actions and under the guise of basic nutrition it led to binging of sorts more than anything, yo-yoing between guilt, rebellion and force.

I love my iPhone, yes one might call me dependent. It has apps! Apps that record your blood-sugars on the go, that can count your calories, give you nutrition information instantly…it’s endless! I’ve tried the looseit! app and it’s great.

But here’s why I had to let it go:

It was a battle. One low blood-sugar could ruin my entire day. And it would make me feel defeated. An unplanned granola bar could put me 120-200 calories past my daily allocation, 60 calories could be stolen by an unwanted juice-box. It was another reminder of restriction. Like the times when I wanted a snack and couldn’t have the carbs.

Or the times when my blood-sugars were normal or even high yet I wanted a snack by choice – the guilt of eating when I didn’t have to.

In adapting to a crazy work schedule, frequent meals at the office, NYC dining and the world of Healthy Living Blogs, I discovered both spectrums of “whole foods.” After struggling with the vulnerability of “open” food from restaurant ordering, I finally connected with the various mind sets of wholesome eating.

Growing up with a health nut father I learned early on about honey vs white sugar or the benefits of whole grains. But growing up in the 90s where I had buyers choice at my moms it was all about the pre measured & pre packaged snacks – my dad’s kitchen would throw me off and scared me.

Restriction is a difficult thing. If you don’t know what you’re missing you may be ok but once that door of temptation opens you become vulnerable. It goes hand in hand with food. As much as I try to control food, often through restriction, it strongly controls me. My health, my decisions, my actions.

So in letting go of the obsessive calculations, I’m aiming to focus on the things that I can enjoy – and truly enjoying them. Seeing food as an experience rather than a controller.

And where does that leave me now? I still hate grocery shopping, am constantly picking up packages to look at nutrition labels and read the latest news. Energy bars, granola bars and protein bars still make up a large part of my diet. But that may equally have something to do with my lack of cooking.

I’ll never be able to let go of planning, knowing and calculating – but now I’m trying to manage it in a more wholistic approach.

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Related Links

I knew that just because every time I see a new product I instantly look at the nutrition label doesn’t mean that everyone else does. But only 9% look at calories and 1% (!!) look at other nutritional information ?? With the diet trends in America I would have expected more. | Fit Sugar

Calorie-Conscious without counting | Fit Sugar


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Friday Favorites: 1.27

How sweet is this surprise date?

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Carrot Cake cupcakes that are grain-free and only 3 carbs ? Yes please! {found via this recipe round-up}

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Tina {Carrot ‘n’ Cake} shared Harvard’s alternative MyPlate : Healthy Eating Plate

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I’m all for chick flicks but I don’t know about this

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This parenting trick for hypochondriac drama. I want to parent like that.

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If you haven’t already since this video, I first spotted on Rachel’s post, it reminds me of the physical strength that comes from yoga  – not just the inner focus.

 

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I sort of wish that instead of bowls of oatmeal I had this breakfast treat to jack me up on sugar. I mean hazelnut cream cheese  – they make that?? How did I not know of this?

Other “breakfast” goodies brought to you by Iowa Girl Eats : Blueberry Muffin Top Cookies. Muffin + Cookies?? Who wants to make me some?  My doctor’s appointment isn’t until next week and at the rate I’m going 4 miles tomorrow requires serious carb loading. Please?

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More yumminess: when I haven’t been shoveling oatmeal or downing juice or glucose tablets I’ve been mixing up my lunch routine. After months of {veggie} sushi I brought back turkey and/or veggie sandwiches. Todays : Smoke Turkey, hummus, apple & basil. #ohmydeliciousness.

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Today is rainy & gray in NYC so I’m having fun playing with a new “Pop of Color” board  on Pinterest